By: Dani Souza
But what if I’m talking about my first job? What if I’m talking about dropping a job as a journalist, right after graduation, because it simply doesn’t fit?
“How would a strong fierce female such as myself end up feeling this powerless?”, asked the girl in the mirror who I didn’t recognize anymore.
I was aware that I was going to be paid to write whatever I was asked. But I wasn’t prepared to face a funeral – to which I did not agree to go. Which I was asked politely to leave, which would cause my boss to tell me I haven’t met the goal of going there in the first place. That was hard. Then I had to write about a disease crisis, blaming someone that wasn’t really responsible for it. Then I just felt I wasn’t doing what I aimed for in life.
Oh well, “what’s the harm?”, some might ask. Isn’t it what every adult does? Isn’t it what your parents had to do in order to keep you safe, warm, and well fed? How dare you consider quitting?
It took me some time to realize the difference between what I was really doing for myself, and what I was doing for others.
1. When my parents told me I wasn’t happy, I listened to them. Not because I’m the kind of girl who does everything my parents tell me, but because I know they are people I can trust to want my happiness.
2. I stopped thinking about money as the most important thing. After that I still had a lot of experience to consider – nevertheless it was my first job –, but money should never be a guide anywhere.
3. I found out I wanted to feel alive. I knew I needed the experience, but what was the price I was paying for it? Was it worth it waking up wishing I had died in my sleep? – Oh yes, there is such feeling and if you recognize it, please, do not think it is how you were supposed to feel.
4. I stopped listening to every voice that would tell me how great it would be to stay a little longer--- just because it hasn’t been a year yet.
And girl, if you are not happy, let me walk you through some important memories:
Do you remember the girl your teachers said was brilliant? Do you remember your parents smile when you got into college? Do you remember how proud you were of yourself after every accomplishment? Do you still think about how professors and classmates would compliment your achievements?
Do not forget that girl who had the power, courage and intelligence to take over the world. You are this wonder woman. Don’t you ever forget about her.