I get really excited when I log on Facebook and realize that I have a notification. But then I’m immediately pissed when I notice it’s some lame guy from high-school inviting me to a party. Fact: I don’t want to go to your teen night party at Club Hush. I didn’t even want to go when I was a teen. Lol why don’t promoters pay attention to who they’re inviting to their parties. I mean a simple target market analysis would save you a lot of time. Avoid the promoters on Facebook, their unwarranted invites can lead to high-blood pressure, trust issues, and a false sense of hope.
A few months ago, I had to unfriend a guy who tried to victim-shame a rape survivor. He blamed her for being where she was and wearing what she chose. I was disgusted. So when I confronted him, he said that he was an activist for guys that are falsely accused of rape. No sir, you’re not an activist. You are what’s wrong with the world today.
*clears throat and stands on throne and ratchetly claps* The political preachers are my favorite people to unfriend on Facebook. Even though their post are always great for a good laugh. I mean think about, how can one person constantly flip their positions and pick and choose when they want God to rule their political decisions. I have a friend on Facebook who doesn’t believe in Marriage Equality. And though that belief disgust me, I’m used to hearing it. I went to a Christian University in the south, so that belief is fairly common. What surprised me were her views on food stamps and aiding Syrian refugees. How can you deny someone the right to marry based on your religion, but ignore the truths of your religion when it comes to something else? Do you really think Jesus would’ve given a drug test before feeding the hungry? Do you think he would’ve denied helping victims of a war? I understand that we all have different beliefs, but when your beliefs aren’t consistent I screenshot you and laugh. #sorrynotsorry *twirls away*
*sings* “So I creep, yeaaaaaaaa! Just creeping on the down low.” Can I add professional Facebook stalker to my resume? I feel like I should be rewarded if I can identify your great-great-grandmother’s twice removed uncle before our first date. #bonuspoints I’m not going to lie, I creep on people I shouldn’t, like my ex-boyfriend. Lol but it’s not an I miss you creep, it’s more like a just checking in to make sure your life still sucks creep. *whispers to you* Trust me, it always still sucks. Lol
My name is Amira, and I overshare on Facebook. That’s literally all I do on the site. I share videos, I share articles, I share memes. You have to scroll down for a while to find a post I’ve natively written on Facebook. I can’t help it, tasty videos have taken over my life. *twirls away*
If you post on Facebook more than once a day then you need to switch to Twitter. *drops mic* Yea, there’s really no other option. Use Twitter if you want to speak to your followers more than once day-it’s simple. Facebook is not your diary, so stop filling up my TL before I convince the Facebook algorithm that I hate you and I never have to see your post again. JK Facebook purposely shows you your frenemies.
Earlier today I got into a Facebook debate with this girl I went to highschool with. *face palms into a sigh* I really hate Facebook debates, they make me question the public school system. Anyways, posted a video of that kid who impersonated an OBGYN. But here’s the kicker, she was DEFENDING him. She was defending a kid that claimed to have a title that takes years to achieve. A title that comes with trust and responsibility. A title that helps bring life into this world. I hate Facebook debaters because no one checks facts before pressing share. No one does research before spreading false rhetoric. Everyone thinks they’re an expert, when they’re really just ll-informed and uneducated. *Kanye shrugs*